Friday, 30 September 2011

Shoe In!

Some elections are close run things. This one was quite different. Sandie insisted that we go to the Parents Teachers Association meeting this evening at Maxime's school. Sandie forewarned me that the committee of three was resigning and that under absolutely NO circumstances should I volunteer either myself, or worse still, her for any of the president, secretary or treasurer roles.

Imagine our shared concern when it transpired that apart from the three departing officials and head teacher, only 5 other parents turned up. The odds were already looking grim. The conversation basically went back and forth between the outgoing officials saying that the job was really fun and easy, and the nervous parents saying that they had no time and demanding jobs. As the nibbles and the chilled cider got finished, I felt like some Euro finance chief facing a weekend lock in to ensure a resolution before the markets opened again on Monday morning. I suppose the only difference was that Jean-Claude Juncker (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean-Claude_Juncker) and Jose Manuel Barroso (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jos%C3%A9_Manuel_Barroso) probably weren’t surrounded by cuddly toys, jigsaws and felt tip pens.

I personally was being extremely well behaved (for once), and regularly pleaded the fact that I was foreign and often working in a different country to keep myself out of trouble. Every time peoples’ gaze settled on me, I quickly shuffled off to give Maxime some more crisps to keep him quiet. Then after the president and treasurer posts had already gone, Sandie then made a fatal mistake by giving the only remaining couple a way out. They lurched for the exit and the die was cast. I made a final desperate attempt to salvage something and trade a few horses to get her the presidency (she is better at giving rather than taking orders), but alas, she is now going to be writing letters for Maxime’s primary school for the next 12 months at least…

Well, look on the bright side, we have lots of spare time at the minute with two full time jobs and three small kids so at least we don’t have to worry about what we’re going to do on those cold winter evenings that are fast approaching……humpf

A new light

It took me six months to pluck up the courage, but I finally bit the bullet and on Tuesday morning I decided to look at Paris in a new light. It has never been one of my favourite cities, although I definitely seem to like it more now that I live somewhere else. As my flight landed in Orly airport at 8AM, I decided that I would take my first ever motorbike taxi to the office in Bezons on the other side of the city. I’ve only ever ridden a motorbike once, (or been a passenger more precisely), and it’s never been something that has ever really appealed to me. That said, the more I travel to Paris, the more I conclude that the RER and metro system appeals to me even less.

Overall the whole experience was super. It was extremely pleasant to be above ground and even better to be whizzing past the morning rush hour traffic. It felt surprisingly safe, for the most part, although maybe my vision was blurred by the heated backseat I was sitting on. I also appreciated the fact that I didn’t have to hug a complete stranger for 45 minutes – they’ve put some very reassuring handles at the side for the passenger. The price was a reasonable (sic) 85 euros (the same price as a car taxi to go the 40 odd kilometers during rush hour), and I was even impressed by the electronic receipt sent to me by iPhone as I got off the bike. I now see all my future trips to Paris in a different light – the more cars, traffic jams and general strikes the better! Vive le moto I say!

To err or not to err

One of the things that has been taxing me as I have been twiddling thumbs in airport lounges recently is, that given that a single decision may prompt numerous consequences, some good some bad and others neutral, how do you make a definitive choice as to whether or not major life decisions (i.e. those that involve high levels of emotional input), were well made or not e.g. emmigrating, getting married, the decision to have children etc? I don’t think a simple weighting system is sufficient (what exactly was John Mill’s unit of utility that I studied all those years ago?..http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Stuart_Mill) especially when at least some of the consequences may not be immediately obvious. Hmmmm…

Friday, 23 September 2011

Weekend Princess

I'm currently in Toulouse and will spend the weekend here for my mother in law's birthday. Maxime is already here, but the rest of the O'Brien clan will arrive tomorrow. What that does mean however is that tonight I have the bed all to myself. The even better news is that it is my little niece's bright pink princess bed. That said it's just a shame that my feet are prodding out the end....

I say you understand, I see you feel, I like I work

A few things have stood out this week, my third in EMC…. Firstly the following rather gruesome article in the Economist (http://www.economist.com/node/21529041) made a very good point that every consultant should remember – it’s not what you say that is important, it’s how the other person understands what you say. This is obviously made more complicated when there is a company lexicon which I don’t necessarily master yet e.g. what is the real difference between presales, sales and business development? In any case a timely reminder as I embark on a restructuring of the group for 2012.

A second thing that struck me is that when things are generally unclear and no-one has clear roles, responsibilities or direction, that people have a greater propensity to be worried, uncomfortable and insecure. Although I can have see how things are going to work out and who the superstars are going to be, if this isn’t formalized and communicated to the wider organization, then people (including the to-be superstars), are not going to feel good or relaxed at work.

The other thing which is beginning to come home is that you work better for people you respect, but going beyond that, you’ll only ever run through brick walls or over hot coals for someone you like.

Wednesday, 21 September 2011

Coucou it’s me again

It’s been a good few days since the last post. Surprisingly enough it’s been quite busy. To get friends and family up to date here’s a quick summary…

Maxime – enjoying school after his first school rentrée – quite blasé about the whole thing in fact, parents quickly forgotten about after he is deposited at the school gates each morning. Capcuine and Gaston – absolutely fine as well, they started at crèche on Monday so no more Mimi the nounou for them (a different story). Gaston continues to refuse to crawl anywhere, although this now at least seems to annoy him, which we are construing as progress. Capcuine is overly active and seems to be a mini-Maxime, except for the fact that she will clearly be the boss of the house, if she isn’t already.

Sandie – handling the fact that my new boss is also called Sandy very well, and having a whale of a time at work. The recent show jumping competition in the front garden went wonderfully well with over 140 horses competing over the course of the day (a real feat especially for her first competition). She also had over 2000 visitors to the Stud Farm last weekend for the French National Heritage Open Day thing when all government buildings are opened to the public. She combined this with an art exhibition in the stables which was also extremely well received. The big event of Monday, sorry, one of the big events, was the reception of her new car – a black Qashqai +2. After months of deliberation we didn’t manage to agree on the car we wanted so she applied the 80/20 rule and opted for Nissan. I will huff and puff in my little corner for a while yet, and I’ll come out when I’ve decided if I want to change my little Twingo, and if so, what for (naturally I already have a few ideas and will no doubt be well counseled by my young petrol head cousin in Glasgow!).

Job – going fine. I am still in the process of meeting lots of people. I think I have almost got the lie of the land. What strikes me is the number of pockets of good people dotted around the place. I think the key thing that is holding us back is the lack of a single vision uniting all of these different groups of people, and the sheer number of different moving parts in the company. This week is a busy week in London, Paris and Amsterdam, and it will culminate with a key meeting on Friday where we will hopefully get a bit of an agreement on how to fix some of these things. Big trips are also planned for Bangalore, Boston and Johannesburg/Cape Town over the next couple of months. Air France continues to send me excessive amounts of special offers and other marketing rubbish.

Pich – doing ok despite knocking his hip on a metal girder at the weekend because of another stallion showing just a bit too much interest in his hindquarters. After a busy August with nine days of competitions in the space of three weeks we’ve had a relatively quiet period with lots of serious work being done at home. It feels like we’ve made progress, and although things are not completely perfect, we’re probably in need of a competition to see if things really are better or not. After almost a season of serious work, he also seems to be becoming less of a stroppy, lazy teenager and more of a responsible young adult so hope springs eternal (NB I’m currently less sure about the eight ages of horses, but I suspect the process is at least similar in part despite the fact I’ve never seen him on a scooter - see previous posting)...

That’s it for the minute. Consider yourselves updated!

Intertwined Circles

My latest musings on the “seven ages of man”, or the eight according to my theory as you’ll see below…

Age 1 – You are completely dependent on others. From your birth until around the time you can legally drive a scooter.
Age 2 – You constantly seek greater independence and autonomy. From the time you fly about on less than roadworthy two wheeled contraptions until the age when you have moved out of home, have your own flat, and are paying your own rent or mortgage.
Age 3 – You achieve and enjoy total independence. The roaring hedonistic twenties when with your first job you realize that you actually have more money than you need after having spent the last 3 years living on baked beans on toast at university.
Age 4 – You choose to give up some of that independence and get married. It seems like a sensible idea at the time because whilst having fun is fine, you ultimately believe that two heads are better than one. Sometimes you even think that it will be fun to share fun with someone else – two funs are also better than one.
Age 5 – You start having people who are completely dependent on you. This is obviously the arrival of children phase. Exchanging fun for dirty nappies. An obvious enough choice when you think about it like that.
Age 6 – Just as you have started enjoying small people being dependent on you, they have moved into their own Age 2. It starts with small things such as refusing to hold your hand when crossing the road and quickly deteriorates into a stroppy teenager.
Age 7 – You no longer have people who are dependent on you and you fall back into some mix of Age 3 and Age 4. The exact mix depends on how many genuinely shared interests you and your partner have, the number of childhood friends you’ve managed to keep in touch with despite having had children, or the number of couples who have been thrust upon you just because they have children of the same age over the last fifteen years that you actually like.
Age 8 – You positively seek situations where there are small people in your family in Age 1 in an effort to rediscover the latter phases of Age 5 and the early phases of Age 6. I think I am starting to understand why people seem to be so happy about becoming grandparents (or maybe not, I am sure some will be keen to share their opinions on this posting in due course…)

And here’s the rub – I would content that overall happiness depends more on how you transition between including how easily you accept these transitions, rather than the actual time you spend in each phase itself…..

Friday, 9 September 2011

G’day Crocodile Biarritz

I killed a snake this morning as it slithered into the stables. A necessary evil because horses are apparently very scared of them, (although it seemed to me to cause more problems for the three female riding teachers and elderly stable hand than the horses as they all nervously hid behind each other as I finished the rascal off). That however wasn’t the highlight of my week. In fact it’s been a very interesting first 7 or 8 days at EMC and my feet are now almost under the table so to speak (at least when they’re not stamping on a snake’s head that is).

Over the last week or so I’ve talked to management and guys at the coal face; to people in my group and other people in other service lines; to guys in Continental Europe, the UK and the US; and even to some clients albeit very briefly. The whole listening process will continue for another few weeks and there are more key stakeholders I need to meet with, but a few things have already struck me.

The first thing is that there is an immense amount of talent in my group and EMC more generally – one of my most enjoyable and insightful conversations this week was with EMC’s Global Creative Director – even the fact there is a Creative Director was refreshing after some of my other experiences (basically it is nice to find someone who is even more anal about communication, presentation and pretty PowerPoint slides than me!). While remaining ruthless, especially with the sales force, the culture of the place is one where there is a real respect for technical skills and letting people be technologists – I’ve met a lot of really experienced and impressive guys who weren’t forced into project management at the age of 26 and a half. As a consequence some of the stuff they do is genuinely very good. Another key thing that struck me is something that I have found in many other places – setting aside the obvious need for a clear vision for what you are doing, if you don’t have a clear set of roles and responsibilities for people, with a clear agreed way of working, then you’ll struggle to make them successful, and it’s unlikely you’ll be able to motivate them over the longer term. The overriding analogy that keeps popping into my head is that we are a (rather sexy) jigsaw puzzle with all the bits mixed up in the box, and that we just need to be put together in the right way to have a very special, premium, result. I just wonder how long that will take and that’s what I can’t judge for the minute.

As for downsides, I am pleased to realize that it’s just a collection of technical teething problems relating to my laptop, email account and the absence of a Blackberry (which I am actually convinced is a blessing). All in all I start the weekend a pretty contented bunny and am looking forward to the show jumping competition that “Sandie 1” (the domestic boss rather than the professional one of the same name), has organized in our front garden this weekend – on Sunday we expect that 120 horses are going to be prancing around about 20 metres from our front door from 8AM till 7.30PM in 30 degrees heat. Thankfully the snake population is now under control.

Cabbie's Delight

Another one of the UK steriotypes that I always enjoy when I come back to Britain is the London cabby. The one from earlier this week was particularly special. Amongst other things, he told me that he had had an Economist and a Financial Times journalist in his cab that day, and that both of them say that Greece will default in December of this year. So there, you heard it here first, guv'nor. If they had Ladbrokes in France then I'd be off there in a jiffy.

Thursday, 8 September 2011

Happy Plodder

I spent most of the week in London. I like going back to the UK and it's funny how you just can't shake all those cultural associations that you build up during the course of growing up somewhere.... I am not talking so much about my inevitable search for Ribena and Cadbury's chocolate whenever I'm back in Ol' Blighty. This time I am more referring to how happy I was when I stumbled across a local policeman when I managed to get myself lost on one of my infamous morning runs. (I was always brought up to have a positive view of "the fuzz" - how useless I would have been in the recent riots.....). Not many people can get lost in Hyde Park (especially given that there are maps every 100 metres), but this week that's exactly what I did. After about 1 hour and 10 minutes of running (in what later turned out to be ever increasing circles), and after having asked a number of random people directions back to my hotel, it was only after the local Bobby had told me where to go did I genuinely feel relieved and confident about being able to get back to where I had started my run 70 minutes earlier. In fact it also made me proud that my little brother is one of the boys in blue, although that feeling of happiness did nothing to relieve the cramp in my legs....

130 Green Fields

Some people are never happy. It took me a few days before I got my new EMC laptop. I then complained about the fact that my email account wasn't set up correctly meaning I couldn't read my emails. Another few days later I finally managed to get access to my mailbox. My heart sank as the very first time I opened Outlook 130 emails fell into my lap within the first 30 seconds of being connected. The grass isn't always greener and I really need to be careful about what I wish for.... Thankfully I am a quick learner so I am making much less of a fuss about my as yet to be delivered Blackberry phone....

Sunday, 4 September 2011

The times they are a changing...

I talk not of the second Greek bail out nor the increase in the US debt ceiling. I am also not referring to the recent toppling of Tripoli. The times that are changing relate to the fact that for the first time in over a decade, Sandie has cooked (not pre-heated) two (genuinely) delicious meals today. In the past she has been known to cook one delicious meal in a day (rare), or to cook twice in the same day (rarer still and empirical evidence suggests that quality quickly diminishes with quantity).

What has brought on this drastic change? Long term “Sandie-Watchers” suggest that it might be the fact that having an au pair live with us has prompted the need to do things a little differently. In any case, the markets are bullish about the change, and shareholders are encouraging her to continue. Aides close to Sandie have indicated that her intrinsic value has increased. However as the saying goes, one fallen Arab dictator doesn’t make a democracy, so we’ll have to monitor the situation carefully - it’s almost a shame that I have to go back to work this week with Monday in Paris and then three days in the Big Smoke in London. Next weekend will be telling indeed.

Friday, 2 September 2011

Lipstick on a Pig

Despite it being highly unfashionable in a culture such as that of Accenture where the next promotion point is never more than 3 years away, I’ve always said that you learn more from the projects that go wrong than those where everything goes smoothly. In a similar vein, I’ve consoled myself this show jumping season with the thought that whilst there have not been many clear rounds, the amount of experience that I (and Mr. Pich de Toulven) have acquired is significant.

For some reason these thoughts came back to the fore of my thinking whilst reading a couple of recent Economist articles.... The first contended that “the extraordinary success of Homo Sapiens is a result of four things: intelligence, language, an ability to manipulate objects dexterously in order to make tools, and co-operation”. The second contended that individual success is dependent on how much you have of four different types of capital and how you use them: economic capital (what you have), human capital (what you know), social capital (who you know) and erotic capital (your level of sex appeal).

Conclusion: I am now going to choose a lipstick that I think Pich will like before going to the stables tomorrow morning.

For those (mainly non parents) who are not having as exciting a Friday evening as I am, you can read the full articles using the following links...http://www.economist.com/node/21524698 and http://www.economist.com/node/21526782

Thursday, 1 September 2011

Different and Good

The other big news of the day - the new au pair, Kathrine from Denmark, is extremely polite and well brought up, owns three horses, loves kids and likes to get up early in the morning. I think we've found ourselves a winner.

Different but Same

I am just back from two days of 2012 planning with my new EMC colleagues. Overall the verdict is positive, although it is clear that a bit more clarity in some key areas is required and that there is lots of work to be done.

The whole leadership team plus a few special guests were there in Spain to talk about what needs to be done next year. There are definitely some smart cookies in the team, including Maxime’s godfather, and I am very much looking forward to working with them. On the first day I did my best to not be myself insofar I spent most of it not saying anything and just listening to the others.....It seems like many of the challenges they are facing are similar to those I witnessed in Wipro e.g. unqualified and ridiculously large pipeline, insufficient good people, unclear job descriptions, not enough focus on various topics etc., but I was reassured to see that it seems like our destiny really is in our own hands. The power of decision seems to sit with my direct boss so that is refreshing.

The other thing that struck me is that Air France are going to love me over the next couple of months....it looks like trips to Paris, London, Geneva, South Africa, Denver, Boston, Paolo Alto (California), Bangalore and Amsterdam are all on the cards. Next week is already going to be Paris and London to meet some of the new guys and a large part of the team that is in the UK. Easing myself into things? Er, maybe not.

Post Match Analysis

It seems like Maxime’s first day at school has been a success - i.e. they have accepted him back tomorrow. Job done.

That said, there did however seem to be a few discrepancies in the respective accounts of the day..... Maxime said that he had pushed over the little children. Thankfully the headmistress disagreed with this account of events. Maxime also said that he had listened to the teachers and had done what they had asked. Unfortunately the headmistress said that he did pretty much what he wanted.

In an effort to put us at ease, she did say that this was not uncommon.... although it sounds like another call for some more discipline at home to me. I shall now go and dust off the bamboo cane and wooden spoon.

Dringgggggggggggggggggg

The school bell has sounded for the first time for Maxime today. As Sandie rightly pointed out, we’ve completed the first of twenty “rentrées scolaires” - it’s not every day that you start something that you know you are going to do for the next two decades!

Over the last week or so Maxime has been wonderfully behaved (not just because we bribe him with chocolate eclairs), and Sandie has started to feel more comfortable about going out and showing her face in public again with him (note: this is completely separate from any discussion about her removing her burka you understand). Thankfully Maxime continued this good run of form today as he happily trundled the 200 metres or so to l’Ecole St. Joseph which is within spitting distance of the stud farm.

The whole event was completed in 4 stages: (1) the walk to the school - top marks; (2) the initial introductions with the headmistress and other teachers and children - 8/10 because he was extremely polite although understandably a touch clingy; (3) the initial exploration of the school (where the total number of pupils is 23) - top marks again because he managed to find all the toy stores, run around screaming without being told off by his mother, find four taps which he took great delight in turning on, and then he even managed to finish this phase of events by finding a mini croissant to stuff into his little face; and (4) the departure of the parents who were summarily dismissed by the headmistress at 9.15AM - 1/10, because he was the only little child who cried (in the other cases it was typically the parents who were crying).

Once he’s eaten the school out of house and home this lunchtime, we’ll pick him up at 1PM before he has his siesta at home. Watch out for further updates - no doubt I will be looking to compare Maxime’s version of the morning’s events with that of his teachers....